Coffee can inspire the crap out of you!

This PJ just popped into my mind when I was making coffee…

What would Ali Baba say if he wanted the sugar in his coffee to dissolve instantaneously?

“GHUL JA, SIM SIM!”

*ducks the eggs & rotten tomatoes*

—-

Quite a lot of “current” issues to talk about. It’s not that anyone cares for my opinions, it’s just that I give them anyway.

1. Reservations: “I hope reservations happen. It’s the only way out. I don’t know why one has to stop at 27 %. What’s 27%? Twenty seven meritorious students out of a hundred won’t get seats in government owned institutions because they’re not backward enough. So be it. We still have the other seventy three students who’ll at least complete the course!”

As ridiculous as it may sound now, two or three years later I’m sure that’s how one’s going to look at things.

I don’t understand the concept of reservations. Is the quality of a society represented by representation alone? Since when?

It’s like bollywood movies dedicating one hour to meaningless songs that are being put there just for the heck of it. Well, not for the heck of it, if you think about it twice or maybe thrice.

Coming back to what I was saying, if you want to have reservations, reserve some seats for the physically challenged in public transport. Reserve money for infrastructure. And reserve a huge chunk of that money for primary education. Reserve effort to curb the dropout rate.

Get the kids from the slums and the chai-shops – not to mention places like Sivakasi – to go to school. And by the time they’re old enough for college, you won’t need to reserve seats for them in IIMs and IITs and what-not. Fund their courses, loan them money to study.

But this would make sense only if the reservation bid is meant to give better opportunities for the so-called backward classes. Sadly, it isn’t.

Ironically, it is meant to please a section of population most of which is illiterate. Better opportunities, my pimpled ass!

2. Fanaa, Aamir Khan and the Narmada Bachao Andolan: Aamir Khan has undone what Medha Patkar has been doing for the moment. The hunger strike actually impressed me and it did grab attention and more importantly, concern for the people affected.

All that was screwed up thanks to a naiive artist who wanted to carry the same message as in his last movie. Just for the record, Rang De Basanti sucked. It seriously did.

So, now Mr. Khan wants to be “DJ” off screen and shoot his mouth off about how the rehab’s going on.

The thing that pisses me off about it is the fact that a people versus state fight has become a person versus a political party war of words. Nobody wants to talk about whether any work is going on in the affected areas. All they’re interested in is who said what and what was said in retaliation.

And I’m happy for the people of Gujarat because they don’t get to see Fanaa. The promos were enough for me. Kajol is fat and Aamir looks old enough to play her father.

That’s probably the only good thing Modi’s cronies have done so far for Gujarat.

3. India lose to the W.Indies in the ODI series: Tough shit, grow some balls, would you? And how many of us really care about Sachin Tendulkar’s shoulder? I know for sure, I don’t.

4. Stock Market Crash: Again, tough shit, grow some balls, would you?

5. The Da Vinci Code: The less said, the better.

6. The Christian Census: Okay, this pisses me off. I really don’t care if Muslims are outnumbering Hindus or Christians are outnumbering whoever.

And what’s the Pope’s problem if India chooses to have anti-conversion laws? Are there mosques or temples in the Vatican?

Speaking of anti-conversion movements, Jharkand has passed a new law which says that anyone who converts to Islam must register themselves at the nearest police station failing which they face a jail term and/or a fine of fifty thousand rupees.

Another absurd new rule – you can change your name only once!

Oh, but nothing can beat the 27% reservation, can it?

—–

I just realised my grammar sucks.

—–

A riddle: Why did Ali Baba say “Ghul ja, sim sim!” ?

He was trying out a Mallu accent.

*runs*

Amen.

There are two types of people.

Well, there are at least two types of people.

The world is weird, isn’t it?

I think I’ve said enough.

Amen.

Two things happened at work today. One, I think I lost a friend and two, I realised I am not half as good as others around me.

I was told that you really can’t have friends at work. I thought otherwise. Well, now, I’m beginning to wonder…

I was also told I am not cut out for BPO work, data entry or anything to do with numbers. I thought otherwise. I’m wondering more now…

Oh screw it, I quit.

Amen.

Has this ever happened to you?

You plan to meet someone. You look forward to meeting them. You meet them. And the only thought you have after that is to get the hell out of there.

Has this ever happened to you?

Or, is it just me?

What?