It’s weird.

When people say “I don’t care”, do they really mean it? I mean, if they cared not to care, that would mean they really care.

Tell me to shut up.

Amen.

PS: Actually, don’t.

So a kid gets trapped in a ditch.

But is it really worth all the media coverage?

I mean, do I really need to watch all the news channels have live pictures of people praying for the kid’s safe return beamed live to my tv.

It’s not that I don’t like the kid, in spite of him having a funny name and a goofy hairdo. I mean, what kind of a name is “Prince”. He must definitely have parents in denial. So, what are they called, King and Queen?

I really feel sorry for him, but can you please tell me things that really matter? Like whether the cops actually managed to nab the guys who blew up seven train bogies in Mumbai? Did Lebanon get raped more by Jews? Did Bush say any other swear word while taking a piss or jerking off? Did people actually attend the party which will be printed in tomorrow’s Bangalore Times’ third page? What made Saurav bitter with his ex-boyfriend, Dalmiya? If monkeys are our ancestors, why didn’t they evolve?

I mean, aren’t there things that are worth covering more than a stupid kid stuck in a ditch? If I were a reporter, I’d have wrapped up the story in less than thirty seconds.

“Sometime on Friday, a boy named Prince (a smirk on my face) fell into a ditch. Curious villagers and police have been feeding him with the help of a rope. He’s doing fine and will probably hit puberty by the time he’s out. Back to you in the studio.”

I’m glad I’m not a reporter. One, no self respecting reporter would cover a story like this. Two, the above “report” just shows me how bad a reporter I would have been anyway.

Okay, screw it, the army has been called. The boy will be out soon, I guess. The army’s probably like, “Let’s smoke ‘im out”.

We’re a people with misplaced priorities. Well, who isn’t anyway?

All the best, Prince…..

….NOT!

Amen.

PS: My roomy’s idea of helping the kid. “Give him a floating device to hold on to and pour water till he reaches the top.”

Yeah, and the loose mud around him is water proof, right?

And he calls himself an engineer. *shudder*

Okay…

So, the government has lifted the ban on Blogspot.

Thank you, fuckers.

Amen.

PS: So, is this post a threat to the nation?

Although I don’t follow football…

…I have to ask this…

WTF WAS ZIDANE THINKING?!?!?!?!?

I want pizza!

Drawing a Blank.

It’s the easiest thing one can do, isn’t it? Nod. Smile. And maybe a short laugh.

Sometimes, if the bugger’s trying to get too chummy with you, a high-five. But that’s it. Nothing else.

You don’t have to listen to the person, forget understanding what the hell they’re trying to tell you. As long as you have a Judas Priest or a Metallica in the background, who cares about what this loser has to say, huh?

And besides, when you got rock in the background, you don’t have to worry about the nodding part, do you?

I try to read faces. If they’re telling me something they really think I should know, it’s probably got something to with sex, sport or a combination of both… in short, something I haven’t been doing for a long long time… Lost the flow here… wait…

As I was saying, if they’re telling me something they really think I should know, I would know that very instant, I wouldn’t be interested in what they’re trying to say. When that happens, my mind tells the ears to listen to the drums and not the vocals. You get my drift, right?

If it’s a joke and the ‘teller’ is kind of tipsy at that time, they would have started laughing even before the second syllable is uttered. That’s the cue for me to start laughing when they stop talking. How do I know that the person has stopped talking? A lot of you might say, look at the lips, but I look at the eyes. They expect some sort of reaction. That’s my cue.

After a short laugh, and maybe a well-advised high five, I turn around and say ‘what a fucking idiot’ under my breath and everything is alright again.

These are things I do when I’m at a place with loud music and it’s really hard to see through the combination of smoke and, well, lack of light. And when a pain in the ass friend’s friend happens to be sitting with you. But put me in a place where there’s ample light, not a lot of noise and a more tolerable person with me and I will be at my attentive best.

Or will I? Hm…

Amen.

PS: This nonsensical, well, nonsense, was inspired by Shadows’ latest post.

If Progeon had an award for the Most Perverted Employee, I’d win pants down!

Amen.

Pom-poms!